Yo, Stop Believin’: 10 Straight-Up Lies ‘Bout Passin’ a Piss Test

Yo, Stop Believin': 10 Straight-Up Lies 'Bout Passin' a Piss Test

Yo, what’s good my fellow stoners? Passing a urine drug test can be a real pain in the ass, especially if you don’t want to give up the green stuff. But before you start chugging gallons of pickle juice or popping niacin like candy, listen up – we’re about to bust some myths wide open.

First things first, it’s important to know that THC can stay in your system for up to 30 days or more, depending on your smoking habits. So if you need to piss clean and fast, you gotta be prepared. And let’s be real, most of the methods people swear by don’t work at all.

Now let’s get to the myths you need to avoid if you wanna piss clean:

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Myth #1: Niacin flushes THC out of your system

Sure, niacin can help detoxify your body and regulate blood pressure, but it won’t eliminate all THC metabolites. And taking too much can cause fever, dehydration, and dry, itchy skin. Plus, drinking gallons of water to dilute your urine sample will only lead to rejection since urine tests are more advanced these days.

Myth #2: Consuming vinegar and pickle juice can mask traces of drugs

Drinking vinegar or pickle juice won’t help you pass a drug test at all. Vinegar throws off your urine’s pH balance and causes diarrhea, while pickle juice just contains vinegar and lots of salt that makes you thirsty and dilutes your urine.

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Myth #3: Sports and energy drinks disguise marijuana metabolites

Sorry Red Bull and Gatorade fans, but these drinks won’t eliminate or disguise marijuana metabolites either. They only provide energy and replace essential substances like electrolytes.

Myth #4: False negatives are possible with goldenseal

Goldenseal extract is just another diuretic that labs test for these days. And there’s no evidence that it has any effect on THC or other drug metabolites.

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Myth #5: Pectin prevents drug metabolites from entering your urine

Pectin can somewhat help bind with fatty acids and transfer them to the bowel to keep drug metabolites away from your urine. But this effect likely isn’t strong enough to make you piss clean by itself.

Myth #6: Adding chemical adulterants to your urine sample works and will not show up on a drug test

Chemical adulterants like bleach, Visine, ammonia or Drain-O won’t affect THC metabolites when added to your urine sample. Instead, they change your urine’s pH level or color and make it obvious that you cheated.

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Myth #7: Taking over-the-counter decongestants containing phenylpropanolamine helps falsify a urine sample

Phenylpropanolamine products can cause false positives for amphetamines and put you at risk for hemorrhagic stroke.

Myth #8: If you drink enough, diuretics will eliminate toxins from your system

Diuretics can reduce the concentration of drug metabolites in your urine but won’t eliminate them altogether. And dilution either internally or externally can still result in rejection.

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Myth #9: You can get away with sneaking water into your urine sample

Mixing water into your urine sample using the sink or toilet is risky and unlikely to work since testing facilities no longer provide sinks. And even if they do, the water usually contains a bluing agent and has to be at a precise temperature to pass.

Myth #10: If you fail a drug test, claim you were around people that smoke weed, and they’ll understand

Blaming secondhand marijuana smoke for failing a drug test won’t work since standing next to someone smoking pot won’t cause THC to end up in your system unless they blow it directly into your mouth.

There you have it folks – avoid these myths and save yourself the embarrassment of failing a drug test. Stay safe and keep toking!

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