Yo, peep this – so the 5-0 in New Orleans be straight trippin’ cause rats done took over their crib downtown. These rodents ain’t playin’ around either, they out here munchin’ on the green stash stored in the evidence room. Anne Kirkpatrick, the big boss of the New Orleans Police Department, spilled the beans at a city council meeting, talkin’ ’bout how the rats be gettin’ lit off that good good in the evidence room.
She was like, “Yo, these rats be eatin’ our stash, man. They all up in here gettin’ high as a kite.”
But it ain’t just about the rats chowin’ down on the weed, nah. The whole building is infested with these critters, leavin’ poop all over the place – even on the desks of the cops and other workers. And don’t even get me started on the roaches runnin’ wild up in there too.
The police headquarters in NOLA got more problems than just pests though. This joint got mold growin’, elevators that barely work, and HVAC systems that are straight up trash.
One OG from the NOPD spilled some beans to a reporter, sayin’ that rats been takin’ over that spot for almost two decades. He mentioned how some officers be coughin’ and sneezin’ after chillin’ in the moldy building that’s been around since ’68.
“It’s a nightmare. This place never really bounced back from Katrina, you feel me?” he said. “The basement was flooded during that mess. We got rodents crawlin’ through the walls like it’s nothin’. Can’t reach every nook and cranny, so there’s always been some kinda critter lurkin’ ’round.”
Now check this – the NOPD been tryna get a new HQ for five years now. Back in 2019, they asked for $39 million to build a fresh crib, but the city council ain’t come through with the funds.
Kirkpatrick, who just took charge as superintendent last year after comin’ from out West, been pushin’ hard for a new spot for her 400-strong team. She called out the current building as a major turn-off for new recruits and current staff.
“It’s wack, man. No one should be treated like this and be called ‘valued’,” she said.
She also pointed out how all police facilities in NOLA are in dire straits. The place is filthier than your ex’s lies, according to Kirkpatrick. She even shouted out the janitors for tryna keep up with cleaning up that mess.
At that council meeting, Kirkpatrick asked for approval to move the department to a new high-rise downtown for 10 years while they figure out a permanent spot. The committee gave it a thumbs up, sendin’ it to the full council for a vote.
Gilbert Montaño, the city’s head honcho, called this move “Herculean.” Once they move shop downtown, other buildings at the justice complex will also be cleared out.
“I’m thinkin’ all them criminal justice agencies gonna need new spots while we deal with these old busted buildings,” he said.
And yo, peep this – this ain’t even the first time rats been munchin’ on evidence weed. Other police departments in South America and Asia reported similar incidents of rodents gettin’ faded off that green stash.
In Argentina back in 2018, eight cops got axed after claimin’ mice ate almost 1,000 pounds of bud from a warehouse near Buenos Aires. But experts from Buenos Aires University said mice wouldn’t mistake weed for snacks and if a gang of ’em ate it, there’d be more dead bodies than Coachella in that warehouse.
Fast forward to India in 2022 where rats supposedly snacked on over 1,100 pounds of confiscated weed stored at another police warehouse. An official straight up told a court in Uttar Pradesh that rats ain’t scared of no po-po.
So yeah, New Orleans PD got rats chowin’ down on their tree stash but they ain’t alone in this struggle. It’s like a worldwide epidemic of rodents gettin’ high off confiscated weed. But hey, at least the janitors out here tryna keep it clean.