Packing, organizing, making lists. Mind on what I want to say about faith and grief and Tiggy’s House. Worried that when the time comes no words will come. And I have a book review due on Tiggy’s birthday.
How I didn’t notice that way back when I applied, I do not know. It only just occurs to me as time is running out and I realize it isn’t getting written before we leave. The book wasn’t getting read before we leave.
I take it to the car, to the passenger seat, so it won’t get forgotten.
And I didn’t really know what the book was about. The Rules of Inheritance. The title wasn’t really suggestive of anything to me.
So I start reading it somewhere south of Beatrice, after our last errand and we’re finally really on the road. And I realize this is going to be hard. Hard to read. Hard to review.
It’s about a girl, a young woman, really, consumed by the grief of losing her mother at 18, and then her father. Both to cancer. Both after years of medications and hospital stays and alternative treatments.
And she is lost. Adrift in a sea of grief. The alcohol, the cigarrettes, the sex, the abortion at 19 . . . it is all so raw and so hopeless and so close. I have a husband, children and a faith that sustains. I have anchors so that when the world seemed to wash away, there was a limit to just how far I could drift.
But I was always aware of the darkness on the other side, always a little afraid of just how strong the desire to escape was. But Claire Bidwell had no such anchors in her life and she spent years running away from her grief.
Except that only left her deeper within its grasp.
And I’m not really sure whether or not to recommend this book. It is good. It is well-written. It is hard to read. I don’t regret having read it and it certainly gives insight into just how hard it can be to lose someone you love. And there is hope as well as you are slowly introduced to an older, more mature Claire who stops running and starts finding a way to help others. But the journey is ugly and maybe not one everyone will want to accompany her on.
This is a paid review for the BlogHer book club, however all opinions are my own.